Day 3 True Meaning of Fear or That Nut You Do Not Know You Are Sitting Next to

Day 3 True Meaning of Fear or  That Nut You Do Not Know You Are Sitting Next to

I hear people say “It was the scariest ever.” If they have not birthed something from their vagina, they do NOT know fear. You have 9 months to think you are ready. You are NEVER ready. Then this little person is pulled screaming and hollering from your body and they NEED you. Not like “I NEED you to pick up milk” need you but like really NEED you….you know to like LIVE. If you drop them they might die, if you do not feed them they will die, if you do not hold them enough, or hold them too much they will have Mommy issues. Maybe even end up in an Ann Rule book like Hello Ted Bundy. They need you. If that isn’t overwhelming enough, you are suddenly scared all of the time. All of a sudden your nerve endings are exposed! Your baby cries your body physically reacts. I remember getting into the shower and my daughter cried and my breasts suddenly turned into two deadly squirt guns. I shot the wall in perfect symmetry across the room…Then I cried about it (hormones are a bitch). Then the “what ifs” start. What if the baby is not breathing, what if they choke, what if a tree falls on the nursery, what if I miss a step walking down the hall and I fall and crush my baby. It is ridiculous and oh so real. It doesn’t stop. As they get older and want to go to a birthday party where someone else will drive them. You just know they will perish in a fiery car wreck because you are not behind the wheel. Or they are in the back yard playing. You can see them, but still you have the willies because some freak is just waiting, lurking ready to steal your child. Oh hundreds of those thoughts are in your head throughout the day. It never ends it just gets worse. Paranoia with Destroy you. Well, not right away, but it really makes you little freaking nuts. We hide it well though. We as parents become masters at hiding our fear of the long drawn out and elaborate ways that bad things will happen to our children if we are not RIGHT THERE WITH THEM! We seem sane, but really that ended the minute they cut that leash (umbilical cord) and that child was no longer tethered to us. I can walk into a room and point out 50 things that may harm my child in the time it takes you to step over the threshold. You suckers, that are hanging with the crazies and don’t have a clue.

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